Thoughts from a Mental Ward

UPPERS AND DOWNERS
July 28th, 2009
by Aaron David Ward

Home values in 20 major US cities fell less than forecast in May…to bad they didn’t fall more…it might’ve spurred sales.

A key index of consumer confidence fell more than expected in July so maybe lowering expectations is in order or just ignoring the index.

Sprint Nextel has purchased Virgin Mobile for $483 million…so I guess I can count on crappy cell service off major highways.

IBM is buying analytics software and solutions provider SPSS in cash…even Big Blue likes all green in this economy.

Bank of America has closed 259 ATMs and 30 branches…now you can find drugs on street corners easier than banks.

Sumner Redstone of Viacom and CBS says several bidders are interested in his family’s movie theaters…they better be 3D if they want to make money.

Europe’s second-biggest oil company, BP, says its 2nd-quarter profit declined, which means its profits are no longer obscene just outrageous.

Coach reported lower quarterly profit, who needs a handbag when you have no money to put in it?

Hedge funds that provided bankruptcy funding to Delphi won an auction to take control…so if an auto part breaks blame a financier instead of an engineer.

European Aeronautic Defence & Space Co reported a 69% jump in 2nd quarter earnings…they must love Obama’s Afpak war.

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